Just a week and a half left. It is no longer surreal; it is monumental! Under the feelings of excitement has crept some nervousness and feelings that overwhelm me but that I cannot seem to put words to.
It’s interesting to me to look back over the past year and a half. There were times when we felt so discouraged; felt like the task was too big. So silly of us! God has been so, so faithful and we can see how He has provided and how He came through on His promises.
I think the greatest lesson I have learned through this journey is what it means to truly trust in the Lord. Frustratingly enough, I still have moments of doubt even when He has proved himself over and over but God our Father is gracious and continually reassuring. I am ever grateful that His love never fails and never gives up.
We were blessed to be commissioned at the PAOC district conference this week. Leaders from all over Ontario joined with us in prayer; it was an affirming moment. During the service, God spoke and it seemed as though His words were just for me. He said…sometimes you feel like I am far from you but it is not about feeling; it is about knowing. It was a beautiful word. Regardless of how I may feel, I can KNOW that my God is ever-present and that he loves and cares for us. Fear and doubt may overcome me at times but I can rest in the assurance of the nature and character of God.
Now that the time has finally come; we find our focus shifting. For so long, all of our energies have been directed towards getting to Cambodia. Now, it is how God will use us that occupies our thoughts. You see, this isn’t just about a grand adventure or even just about helping people. We have a purpose and that purpose is to see lives transformed by hope in Jesus Christ. Our greatest prayer is that we will be effective and that God will use us to add to the Kingdom.
We sang this song this week at conference and at the brink of this great change in our lives, I felt the words comfort and uplift me:
Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Saviour
I will call upon Your Name
Keep my eyes above the waves
My soul will rest in Your embrace
I am Yours and You are mine